In January I embarked on a journey with 4 amazing women to study the book of Esther in the Bible. Last night our study brought us to chapter 4, where Queen Esther learns that her husband proclaimed a day when everyone in the Persian kingdom could kill every living Jew that they encountered. The dilemma? Although Jewish, Esther felt safe in the royal confines of her crown and she refused to intercede on behalf of her people. Then came the challenge:

For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father’s family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this? – Esther 4:14

The principal theme for this chapter was that God uses times of crisis to turn us on our heels and point us into a new direction. Esther’s crisis revolved around her and her families personal safety and she was confronted with a new direction – use her royal position to give the Jews a voice. The cost? She was risking her own life to do so.

Now forgive me as I transition from this crisis of Biblical proportion to my own cushy, I have a roof over my head, clothes on my back and food in my stomach life. About a month ago, I found myself in a modern day crisis…. you know the one – in a society where what you do for a living defines who you are. I have the degree, amazing experience for my age and a job that was way better than what I should of had a year and a half out of college, but I found myself hating my job. Cue emotional crisis. Enter God’s perfectly timed direction change! Exhale.

Thirty days ago i was drowning in the depths of an unfulfilled work life, today I am unemployed and I’ve never felt more alive! I’ve said it many times, but I feel as if I’ve been given the gift of time and the master builder is scraping away parts of my old self, molding my core inner being and adding gifts and strengths to the woman I am becoming.

So in lieu of embracing this new journey, I’ve decided to tackle something that scares me… something that every bone in my body is resistant to doing… something that the loud voice in my head says ‘you can’t do that!’ Are you dying of suspense?! Ok, I’ll tell you… I am going to train for and run a half marathon… now before you pass judgment and think “big whoop!’ allow me to fill you in on a little back story…

I was born and raised an athlete, involved in competitive team sports starting at the young age of 8. By the time I was 16, I had the ‘exercise is fun’ mentality beaten out of me, so I’ve spent the majority of my adult life sporadically participating in recreational exercise I enjoy, like yoga! But running, ugh. I hate to run. Like, a lot! But I love the idea of it and I envy the people in my life that ‘can’ run, because as far as I’m concerned, I cannot.

I’ve watched my friends train for races and seen lives transformed by the simple act of running and I can’t help but wonder, ‘what’s the big deal?’ Well, I’m about to find out.

I am going to run a half marathon, because there’s a smaller, quieter, wiser voice that tells me ‘you WILL do that’.

-And who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this?

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